Tears are not enough, what happens after a tragedy?

I have been thinking and wondering about all the conversations that I have been involved in, listened to, seen on the internet and read on Twitter about the tragic loss of Amanda Todd.  There is a lot to think about, especially based on the publicity, the presence in social media and the reporting in all the media.  The ones that have struck me the most have been under the #RIPAmanda hashtag on twitter.  I have seen so many people sharing the story, saying how it reduced them to tears and being emotional about how the story impacted them.  This has stirred some fear in me and a question, what happens when the tears stop flowing?

As I started to think about a "What next?" question, the Northern Lights song "Tears Are Not Enough" popped into my head and it struck a chord.  Crying over something but not doing anything about it unfortunately accomplishes very little.  What are you going to do differently?  How are you going to act differently?  How are you going to treat people differently?  If we do not learn as a society, and more importantly as individuals from this, then unfortunately we risk to have it continue.

We must become the person that doesn't add to the mess.  It is time to do something about the tears that have been shed, the bad memories that have come back, the thoughts that we could have done something or just the feeling of hopelessness.  There must be a phoenix to rise from these ashes.  There will be programs brought in, speakers hired, panels set up and other ambitious goals will come out of these conversations.  There are all important steps to take, but not everyone is able to do something on a big stage.  In my opinion it starts much smaller.  Every person who has been touched by this story needs to do something small.

There is a small group of middle school students who have approached their principal, with request for anonymity, with a goal of doing random acts of kindness for students that they know are struggling.  There are high school students who are making an extra effort to spend some time at middle schools doing after school sessions specifically targeting at risk students.  Everyone can do something.  It means doing something extra, doing something different.  It means talking to your friends who are making one person the butt of their jokes.  It means cutting out the cutting comments.  It means not losing it on the poor telephone service operator who in all likelihood had nothing to do with your cable not working.  It means not making a rude comment when some poor person is digging through their wallet or purse trying to find the money to pay for the groceries and you are being inconvenienced by a few minutes.  It means taking the time to listen to that family member who can be a drag to listen to but that you know really needs someone to listen to them.  It means take a few minutes of your time to make someone's day a little better, not worse.

Tears are not enough for this tragedy.  There must be a significant shift in behaviour.  The phoenix that must rise is how we respond to what has happened by altering our actions, our attitude  our treatment of others and the respect we show ourselves, others around us and the environment we live in.  Let's take a memory of a tragedy and do something about it to have some positive light come from this.  It would be great to move from #RIPAmanda to #InMemoryOfAmanda and then mentioning some small deed you did to make the world a better place.

Time to look in the mirror

There are times where the topic of bullying becomes more rampant than others.  Amanda Todd's tragic story has brought it to the forefront, and rightfully so.  There is much work to be done, and done with care and that is a topic all on it's own. There are many points to consider such as what is bullying and what is bad play or social emotional difficulties?  Each one can be damaging, but each one also needs to be dealt with differently.

There is another important aspect to this that needs to be considered as well.  What I am finding frustrating is the number of individuals coming out and talking about how we need to stop bullying and yet are publicly demonstrating similar behaviours to that which they are denouncing. It is also usually around this time that we will read comments about how awful the kids are today, how they lack respect and are becoming a lost generation.  Truth be told it is at this time that we probably need to start looking in the mirror and thinking about what our actions, what we celebrate, what we watch and what we say around the children and youth around us and thinking about how our behaviours might be impacting them.  Far too often it does appear to be "do as I say" and not "do as I do".

As we are in election year in the US and the provincial Liberals in BC are trying to stay in power, the attack ads are running.  The same politicians who are denouncing bullying are supporting ads and social media driven agendas that essentially demonstrate what could be perceived as cyberbullying.  They are directed at one person. repeatedly, targeting them sometimes mercilessly with a goal of humiliation, embarrassment and essentially trying to destroy the public image.  In these ads, or ads in the past,  personalities are attacked, mistakes from 30 years ago are aired and other points are raised trying to seemingly convince voters of the ineptitude of the opposition.  At times it feels as though political parties have private investigators looking into finding as much dirt as possible on the opposition and ensuring that it is leaked, broadcasted and streamed via social media.  It doesn't seem to matter if lives are destroyed, it seems to be all about winning regardless of cost.

In sports the trash talker or the agitator is often celebrated for getting under people's skin and getting them off of their game.  We laud the fact that this person has said so much and been harassing the person to the point of getting them to lash out.  A case in point would be the Zidane headbutting of Materazzi after comments were made to him.  This was a defining moment in the World Cup Finals as Zidane was sent off and France lost the game.  Materazzi was hailed for having successfully gotten the French star off of his game and lashing out.  It is such a famous moment in sports that there is actually a statue erected commemorating the moment.  Some football players, hockey players, basketball players and other athletes are known for verbally abusing their opponents to the point of retaliation or playing poorly because of the distraction.  We cheer the fact that they successfully tormented their opponent.  Slashes to the back of the leg, knees to the heads when coming out of a scrum, fingers to the eyes when coming up after a tackle, digging cleats into an opponents foot when possible... What does this teach our young athletes?  How can we tell young athletes that it is OK to verbally taunt, torment or physically assault their opponents and not expect kids to think it is OK elsewhere in their lives. Truth be told, I don't think it has a place anywhere. It does appear that winning, no matter how it comes about is important.  Break a leg, give the person a concussion, verbally abuse them until they react or wilt and so on.  It doesn't matter if you don't have as much talent as they do if you can cheat, steal and physically beat your opponent.

TV shows are also navigating a slippery slope that is definitely going to have a greater impact if the trend continues.  If we look at the TV shows of the 70s and 80s there was an innocence to them.  Many TV shows now seem to be all about snappy comebacks, put downs, setting people up for embarrassment.  The language that is used on a daily basis is language on TV seems to be getting worse.  The sexual overtones, gender portrayals, stereotyping and portrayal of women in videos and movies is sending an embrassingly wrong message to young girls.  There are shows that celebrate people's embarrassments that are shown, all kinds of things put up on YouTube, too often without the person being embarrassed knowing, and especially too often without true consent versus pressured consent.  It doesn't seem to matter what the message is as long as it is provocative enough to get enough attention to keep the show running for another year or to see how many hits you can get on your site.

Kids are told to talk respectfully to adults and yet they will see adults publicly put down and embarrass their colleagues, strangers, friends or other kids.  We tell kids to be respectful to referees and opposition but when they come and watch us play we are berating the official, trash talking our opponents, deliberately hacking away at them to get them off of their game.  We tell them to be careful about what they post on facebook and how they respond on other social media outlets and yet they see important adults in their lives posting pictures of themselves drunk, publicly insulting someone, posting a tweet with violent overtones directed at someone in anger.  YouTube clips of others are posted without asking permission minutes after telling kids to not do the same thing.  Yes, it can be argued that as adults we are better at interpreting social situations than kids, but they see what we do and want to mimic it.

There is no doubt that here is a significant and important teaching quotient that does need to be done to address these issues, but much of it is reduced when kids see adults behave in ways that contradict what is being taught.  If we want the youth of today to make better choices, the adults of today need to show them how it is done.  Perhaps today's adults need to look in the mirror and think about what message we are sending our kids by the way we are behaving, what we celebrate, what we watch and encourage, how we respond to situations, what we cheer for and how we treat others.

If this is a "Lost Generation", then we must examine how we have not done a good job of being guides for them.

Frustration and Behaviour

I was having a conversation today at school today talking today about finding ways to better support students in the primary years.  We talked about how frustrated these learners become as they get older and find the work harder and harder.  They begin to notice that their peers are at a different level.  They are given work that they don't get.  They are asked to focus for extended periods of time.  And so the conversation moved to talking about frustration.

I was thinking about the book I have been reading off and on, Lost at School.  I was trying to put that frustration into perspective during our conversation.  I was trying to put myself in their shoes and it is hard to do.  I have never really struggled in school so I needed to think about other situations.  I am a very even tempered person who rarely gets really upset.  There are basically 3 situations that will usually cause me to swear and become frustrated.  Missing a glorious scoring chance in soccer will usually result in a few inappropriate words and since none of my soccer mates are on twitter I will say that happens VERY infrequently...  Then there is driving in Vancouver.  The last is putting together furniture from a store that shall remain nameless.

The furniture example was the one I chose to use.  It is one of the few times where I really feel like throwing something out a window and tend to use the occasional bit of profanity.  Some of those instructions, in my opinion, are horrible, the pictures are hard to figure out and I usually have to restart a few steps here and there.  Some of these projects should only take around 30 minutes and usually take over an hour.  There are people out there who don't even need to look at the instructions and can just put them together.  Those instructions are easy to follow for some and not for others.  What if those students are experiencing the same frustration that I feel when assembling furniture?

Making music magic happen in the classroom, my dad the music teacher

When it became apparent that my time with my father was getting near the end I began thinking about all of the things that made my dad amazing.  There were two faces to my dad, the head of the Collins household and the music teacher at Van Tech. I am not ready to write about my dad on a personal level yet, but I thought I could write about him as a teacher. He was an incredibly talented musician, one who could listen to a song on a tape a few times and then go to the piano and play it.  For 35 years my dad passionately taught music to grade 8-12 students at a school on the east side of Vancouver at a school called Vancouver Technical Secondary (Van Tech). 

When he passed away on September 18^th, 2011 I decided to set up a memorial page in his name on Facebook, hoping to get a few stories about a side of him that I did not get to see much.  I was not sure what would the response be as he retired nearly 10 years ago.  I have been blown away by the response of former students and I would like to thank them for taking the time to remember my dad, as all I now have are memories.  Many of the stories that have been shared are personal and have brought a lot of joy to my family as we always knew he was a special person.

My dad never sought attention, limelight and did not like to be the center of attention.  His focus was always on his students.  I would often see him sitting at his workbench with a collection of tapes listening to music that his students had given him to listen to and consider using in his class.  My dad taught me a long time ago that in order for students to be motivated to participate in classes they have to be interested in what is happening.  He chose music that would engage his students, and created a classroom environment that made students want to come. 

He had over 300 students taking in his choir classes every year.  All he asked was that you give it your all.  His classroom was always open at lunch and students would come in and spend their lunchtime singing. My dad would record himself playing songs requested by his students who wanted to practice certain songs or enter competitions.  If he could play the song on the piano and the lyrics were acceptable he was game.  Students loved coming to his class.

His memorial page after about 48 hours has over 130 people.  Words that keep coming up are passion, energy, kindness, welcoming, enthusiasm, belonging, joy and respect.  Students from years ago can still name the songs that they sung.  The funny part of that is that the very songs they mention are the ones I remember my dad playing on his stereo at home.  I remember his playing the Phantom of the Opera over and over again.  I remember giving him the Proclaimers tape and I also remember the Lion King.  These are just some of the songs mentioned by former students.

Former students credit him for becoming teachers.  Others would invite him to their weddings because of how important he had been to them.  Others were naming songs that make them think of my dad every time they hear them.  So many students commented on the connection that my dad seemed to be able to make with so many students.  Every time I bumped into a former student of his they would ask me to say hi to him.  I would pass on the message and my dad 9/10 would remember the student and also name any siblings the students had.  When he could not immediately remember the student he would immediately go and grab a yearbook, find them and then be able to tell me a story about that student which I would pass on when I would see that student again.  He loved his job, his students and his school and his memorial page shows that.

This all brings me to ask a crucial question- if you had a memorial page, what would your former students write about you?  What would they remember?  What words would they use to describe you?  Something to think about as you prepare your next day’s lessons.  Is your class one that students would be able to passionately describe 10 years later?  How about 20?  How about 40?  If not, why not?  What could you do differently?  How are you going to be remembered?

Please feel free to visit his memorial page and see what an amazing teacher he was http://www.facebook.com/groups/273224379363786/

I miss him so much, but I am glad that his memory lives on in so many people.  Thank you.

Teaching Social Responsibility with Musicals

There are many ways that as educators we look at ways of working with children on self-regulation, social responsibility and bullying.  We tend to bring in artificial scenarios that the kids cannot relate to, blatantly obvious situations that the kids see right away but rarely happen in real life or we preach.  If the only time these lessons are taught is a contrived environment we risk losing them.

A few weeks ago I went to see Wicked with a friend of mine and had a chance to talk about all the different musicals we saw.  There is something about a good musical, the way the music just captivates you.  There are 3 musicals that really stand out for me for a variety of reasons.  The first is Les Miserables, I love the story first and foremost, and I am in the process of reading the novel by Victor Hugo again.  The second one is Wicked and the third one is Hairspray.

Les Miserables is an amazing story of personal transformation by a man who finally had someone believe in him.  The change in Jean Valjean when he is brought back to the Bishop's residence with the silver that he had stolen.  It is during this part that it comes to one of my favourite literacy moments:

The Bishop drew near to him, and said in a low voice:--

"Do not forget, never forget, that you have promised to use this money in becoming an honest man."

Jean Valjean, who had no recollection of ever having promised anything, remained speechless. The Bishop had emphasized the words when he uttered them. He resumed with solemnity:--

"Jean Valjean, my brother, you no longer belong to evil, but to good. It is your soul that I buy from you; I withdraw it from black thoughts and the spirit of perdition, and I give it to God."

This leads to the amazing change in Jean Valjean from hardened criminal to heartened citizen. He becomes an upstanding citizen who never forgot the opportunity he was given.  There were times where he could have faltered but did not.  In the end he ends up making the lives of those around him better, because someone gave him a chance and believed in him. 
This clip takes you from his time in prison to his meeting with the bishop.
The clip shows you the new Jean Valjean and the way he is still viewed by the police officer.


Wicked was a musical that I saw for the first time at the end of June.  It was an interesting look into school life.  The way it delves into relationships, bullying, friendships, perceptions, seeing the person for who they are on the insider and many other lessons we try to instill in our students is remarkable.  There are so many rich conversations that could be had because of it.
A great clip from the musical of Elphaba standing her ground.


Hairspray is another great story that explores relationships on so many levels.  The story takes place in 1962 and delves into body image, racial relations, separation and segregation and again seeing the good in people, not just how good they look.  The ending of the musical is quite powerful and a heck of a lot of fun.


Great music, wonderful story lines, amazing life lessons and fantastic opportunities to discuss choices, acceptance, inclusion and giving people a chance.  A fun learning environment through music, why not?

School did a good thing

I was reading Lyn's post on reading which was inspired by@thenerdyteacher's #schooldidagoodthing idea and I thought that I would add my own.  I was really lucky to have many wonderful teachers in my school life, whether it be at elementary, secondary or university.  The ones who really stood out for me were the science teachers, or the teachers who loved science.  My Grade 5, teacher, M Raoul, loved science and I am pretty sure that he was the teacher that gave me the bug for loving science.  Now, I will be honest, some of this may gross you out, but here comes the story.


He was very much a teacher who liked to let us explore science.  We got to eat it, live it and breath it.  At one point he brought in pigs' stomachs for the class to cut open and look inside the contents.  I loved it!  We had containers where we emptied the contents to look at the different stages of digestion which he lined up.  He brought the science from the text book and the sheets of paper to life.  It was awesome!  I know some of my classmates did not feel quite the same way I did because some seemed to turn a nice shade of green and had to leave the room, but I felt I was in my element.  We also looked at other animal organs and got to dissect those as well.  He was always so  passionate about everything that he taught. There was no doubt in my my that he was favourite teacher, and even some thirty years later, left a memory that is still fresh in my mind.


Merci M Raoul.

The politics of politics

On Monday May 2nd Canada went to the polls and for the first time in around 7 years Canada has a majority government.  If you are unfamiliar with the structure of Canadian Parliament, there is information here that may be useful for you.  Pretty quickly after the polls were closed in British Columbia the results started to be broadcasted and were becoming clear rather quickly.  While I must confess up front that it was not my party of choice that was elected, it was interesting reading the comments on Twitter, many of them negative about the results.

There was frustration with the fact that a party would have a majority of the seats despite the fact that they only had around 40% of the popular vote.  There was frustration with the feeling that at times voters were not voting for someone they agreed with politically but rather who would have the best chance of beating the person they least wanted in.  Many comments were directed around that BC seemed to have little effect on the overall results because of time difference.  There were also the usual outbursts of corruptness, ethics, personalities and so on.

I am not enough of an expert on the different possible ways that voting can happen, but in every system there is a flaw.  Some systems by design limit the amount of choice someone has when voting, others give rise to parties who may have extreme points of views and others require multiple voting which is taxing on people's time and the countries financial resources.  No system is perfect.  My frustration revolves around what politics appear to have become. An incredible financial, ethical and environmental disaster.

The environmental one is staggering.  How many times are the leaders in an airplane or a bus going from one town to another, one province to another. Towards the end of the campaign the leaders of the different parties seem to spend a ridiculous amount of time flying all over.  I wonder if they have to pay a carbon tax?  The signs that are posted on lawns, abandoned properties and meridians all over the place all need to be thrown out.  What kind of message are we sending to kids with the amount of waste that is produced?  It is quite shocking to think about how many of the pamphlets, mail, brochures and signs are going to end up in the dump or elsewhere.  I cannot even begin to fathom the ecological dammage done, and especially when you consider that 3 of the 4 major parties supposedly have a green platform.

The financial one to me is more distressing.  How many millions of dollars are spent on the campaigns?  The way that elections are now run from signage to transportation to commercials to conventions it is impossible to not discuss money. It appears to be impossible to take part in an election without huge fundraisers.  With everything going on in our country from childhood poverty to unemployment, education and health care is there not a better way for this money to be spent than on the signage and commercials?

I also wonder how much is funded by taxpayers?  To be honest I don't know the answer to this question, but there has to be a portion of campaigning that comes from the tax base.  I don't know about others but I would much rather see that money being spent on healthcare rather than a panflet that tells me what a great party each one is.  If there is to be tax dollars spent on elections campaigns then I would like to see it benefit the tax payers in terms of information, more on this later.

With respect to campaign finances, when you are depending on people and organizations giving you money, are you entirely free to make decisions that are best for the country or province?  With this system in place, does this not essentially mean that every party is in someone's backpocket?  What is their influence on decisions?  If someone/some group has made a substantial donation, would some of them not expect to see something in return?  Does this not, at the very least in appearance, compromise the integrity of the party?  It is unfortunate that we look at the list of donors and the decisions and too often find situations that come off looking suspicious.  It is entirely possible that this it was a decision that was done for the best interests of the country, but the smell is still there.  Ridings with MPs of the majority party seem to be rewarded for voting a certain way.  With this much money involved and the need for MPs to keep their seats, decisions too often do not seem to pass the smell test.

What are some limitation that I would like to see?
1) The number of times a leader can visit a province and region.  If you trust the candidates that are representing each reason then you should not have to be there as much.   In the Greater Vancouver Area there are MPs who are prominent, well respected and known.  James Moore, Libby Davies and, before he was defeated, Ujjal Dosanjh.  Like any good company, you need to have people you can trust to deliver your message.  Why does there appear to be so little trust in the ridings representatives?

2) The platforms should be available to all, and the leader can be given a way to deliver that platform.  Networks could have an evening special with the leaders of all parties who have over x% of the popular vote where they could explain their platforms.  Debates are currently done on two nights, one in French and one in English.  Debates should be regional and not language based.  The Maritimes have their needs, the Prairies have their needs, BC has theirs.  Each region, or better yet province, should be able to hear how each parties' platform will benefit them.  This is where the tax dollars should go, an opportunity for the canadian citizens to learn about what each of the major parties represent in order to make an informed decision.

3) Signage should only be allowed on private property, not on meridians, curbs or abandoned lots.  They need to be made of recyclable material.

4) Stronger Campaign financing and expenditures limitations in place including annual donations from groups and individuals.  If we are to trust our political system then we must have greater confidence in the integrity of the decisions.